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Within one column, Ask Polly: we all have been alone. Our delight and joy and longing and sadness are in our hands that are lonely. We have to allow some available room for darkness. We must acknowledge into believing otherwise that we are not in control of our destinies, even as late-capitalist American culture seduces us. Once I had been 25, i decided to be hitched with kids by 30; we guiltily hid a collection of Cosmo Bride mags underneath the sleep like pornos. At nearly 35 and solitary among hitched and parenting buddies, the line "we constantly thought I would be considered a mom" in No Doubt's Simple Kind Of lifestyle seems additional poignant and not only because I happened to be a true '90s teenager.